You Are Not Your Thoughts: Noticing and Naming in ACT and IFS

“It’s just a thought.”

We say this to reassure ourselves. Or to brush things off. But in both ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) and IFS (Internal Family Systems), the ability to gently notice and name a thought is more than a throwaway moment. It’s foundational.

It’s also incredibly powerful.

What Does “Noticing and Naming” Mean?

At its simplest: a thought arises, and we catch it. Not with judgment, not with a need to fix it — just a quiet recognition.

“Ah, here’s anxiety.”
“That’s a part of me bracing for disappointment.”
“There’s the familiar urge to control.”

This skill of noticing shifts us out of autopilot. It brings the unconscious forward just enough for the brain to process it. Specifically, from the reactive limbic system into the more spacious prefrontal cortex. It’s subtle, but it’s deeply neurological. And it’s a habit we can practice.

What ACT Teaches Us

In ACT, we often imagine thoughts as clouds in the sky. They float through. Some are stormy, some soft. But we are not the clouds; we are the sky.

This is what ACT calls Self as Context- the idea that we are not our thoughts, emotions, or urges. We’re the space they move through.

Noticing and naming a thought: “I’m having the thought that I’m a failure,” rather than “I’m a failure” — creates distance. This is called defusion, and it loosens the grip of thought-as-truth.

There’s a quiet sophistication in this: instead of analyzing or fighting the thought, we just notice it. That alone reduces its hold.

What IFS Adds to the Conversation

IFS sees these inner experiences as parts of us — protectors, exiles, critics, managers. When we name what we’re noticing, we don’t just label it. We begin a relationship.

“That’s a part of me that wants to shut down.”
“This feels like my inner perfectionist showing up.”

Naming a part allows us to approach it with curiosity. Not to fix it, but to befriend it. And when we do, we shift from being fused with a part to being in relationship with it.

This is how we access Self-energy — the calm, compassionate presence underneath it all.

Why This Small Practice Matters

Noticing and naming seems simple, and it is. But it’s also deeply protective. It slows down mental spirals. It makes room for choice. It breaks the trance of unworthiness, fear, urgency, shame.

It’s also how we practice not being at war with ourselves.

Instead of trying to silence the thought or push away the feeling, we create space for it — then respond from our wiser, centered self.

A Gentle Practice to Try

When something hard comes up, try one of these:

“What part of me is showing up right now?”
“Is this a thought, a feeling, or a part of me trying to help?”
“Can I name this experience, without needing to change it?”

That’s it. No deep dive, no analysis, no urgent fixing.

Just the small, radical act of noticing.

You are not your thoughts. You are the one who notices them.

🖤Kas